Hi, I’m Truth

Ever wondered why when we greet people, especially those new to us, that it goes something like this:

 

ME: “Hi mate, how’s it going? I’m Terry.”

DAVE: “Hey, I’m Dave, good to meet you.”

T: “Nice to meet you mate.”

D: “Harry?”

T: “No, apologies, its my mumbling ways, my wife tells me off for it. It’s Terry.”

D: “Jerry?”

{awkward moment where you are not sure if you should correct them again or just smile}

T: “Terry, with a T.”

D: “Oh apologies…Tezza!! (not everyone does this)…So how do you know John?”

T: “We worked together a while back’

D: “Oh really (feigns interest), what do you do for a living?”

T: “I’m in recruitment, well medical recruitment, it’s not really the same as it….”

D: “Ah right, you recruiters are all the same! (winks) And you’re from the UK?”

T: “So what do you do?”

D: “I’m in securities and credit default swaps.” (this is purely a random example I promise)

T: “That must be full-on?”

D: “Yeah I’m just so busy, so busy that I was working this morning (Sunday) before we came here and almost told the wife I couldn’t make it…”

 

I will not take you further into drudgery with the exchange but you get the idea. It is almost as though the script is imprinted on our brains for exactly these moments.

So when I started The Growth Project a few weeks ago you can imagine the slight discomfort I felt as an (internally outspoken) introvert meeting lots of new people.

But I’m getting better at it, and as always it is never as devastating as the anxious voice tells me it will be.

In fact, this day was nothing short of life-changing.

Delivered by Heather Yelland of The Elevation Company, it was a day for pure gold content.

But the part that picked me upside down and rocked my world was the discussion and exercise around Values.

Not once in 33 years have I been asked by any one person to determine my own Values. School, Work, Family. Not one person. To study them, write them down, attribute importance and priority to them.

I could write a book about this day such was its entertainment and effectiveness, but once I navigated the process to determine my Values, I felt I had a Compass. Even if it was just three words scribbled on the inside of my new “Bible” notebook.

The good thing is Values can change and they evolve. I looked at the first list I drafted. Being truly authentic and honest with myself (I’m working on this aggressively at the moment) I knew a few of them I desperately wanted to be my Values, but in reality they were ones I aspired to. These will take some further introspection and action.

But the others explained so much. They explained why I do what I do. They explained why I spent most of life as a robot, lacking confidence and not being my true self.

Why I gradually shunned and sailed slowly away from a superficial world. They explained why I reevaluated the time I spent on essentially empty pursuits (such as increasing digital numbers on a screen).

They explained why I looked back on my isolation, fear of failure, rejection and judgement and started Mr. Perfect.

They explained why I quietly idolise my father-in-law and hope daily I can keep making tiny improvements and be a Father like him to my boy.

They explained why after scribbling these Values all over my page that when we were asked to narrow it down to just one of most importance, I chose this one.

This one value I had made solid progress with and was most important because I had not mastered it, not even close. It gave me room to grow. (Now I know why it’s called The Growth Project).

So when we were set some ground rules about introducing ourselves to the other complete strangers in the room, my chest tightened.

We were encouraged (directed) to introduce ourselves to as many people as possible BUT we strictly could not:

 

(1) say our name

(2) say what we do

(3) say where we are from

 

And here is the kicker. You must first introduce yourself as your most important Value.

The following hive of introduction activity was terrifying, liberating and hilarious all in just a few seconds.

And when the lunch break came the fight internally not to include the banned content into our exchanges was overwhelming. But impactful. It left me thinking about depth of how we connect is something we as humans are losing.

“Hi, I’m Truth, nice to meet you.”

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2 thoughts on “Hi, I’m Truth

  1. Top read – keep up the great work mate!

    Liked by 1 person

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